INTRODUCTION

If you're reading this, that means you're a fan of BILLIE... the charming 1965 movie, the cute title character, or just Patty Duke in general. For us, it's mostly Billie the Beat Girl herself that grabs our interest. Part tomboy-on-the-verge-of-girlhood, part teen super-hero, she was given emotional resonance, ultimately iconic life by the remarkable actress who played her. A force of nature imposssible to resist, especially appealling in sneaks and short-shorts, teen wonder Billie now plays as a proto-femimist, and even a lesbian hero to many. Whatever aspect of Billie appeals to the observor, it's clear this forward-thinking character has left quite an impression. And a legacy. Her new adventures, chronicled as part of this blog, pretty much follow the events of the original film.  They focus less on family and more on comedic action-adventure, pitting the energetic tomboy against equally formidable adversaries, including one familiar arch-enemy in particular.  The following exchange between Billie and her "puppy love" boyfriend, Mike Benson, efficently sets up this new direction:

Mike Benson, a likable young athlete, is jogging alongside Billie Carol, a cute, mop-topped sixteen year-old tomboy in a sweat shirt and shorts.

MIKE: How are things working out with your new guardian?


BILLIE: You mean my big sister Jeannie?  Don’t ask.


MIKE: Your folks sure threw you a curve when they moved to Europe and left her in charge.


BILLIE: Yeah.  She thinks I’m going through a phase with all this athletic stuff. 


MIKE: She could have a point.  According to statistics, the overwhelming majority of American girls give up sports in their teenage years… when they discover boys.


BILLIE: Look, Mike, we tried it your way.  For three uncool months we were just like all the other couples at Harding High, going steady and getting nowhere.  Yeech!  I even quit the track team, started wearing stupid dresses and hair bows…


MIKE: And I started losing interest in you.


BILLIE: Exactly.  That’s the whole point.  I have to be true to who I really am, and that means running, jumping, and bashing bullies whenever necessary.


MIKE: So I’ve noticed.  Personally, I think you and your sparring partner Eddie Davis are getting a little out of hand.


BILLIE: We do brawl a lot.  Ha.  I wallop that blowhard just to stay frosty.


MIKE:  And he wallops you back.  That’s the basis for a very stimulating relationship, provided nobody gets killed.

 
BILLIE (giggles): One of life’s sweetest pleasures is watching Fast Eddie fall on his face.  And if I can do anything to trip him up, so much the better!

MIKE: He’s only one of your enemies.  What about the Frat Boys?


BILLIE: Musclebound losers, every one.  Human punching bags for my eager fists.


MIKE: And those shady characters from the pool hall, the ones who like to corner their victims in back alleys?


BILLIE: Juvenile delinquency is everybody’s problem.


MIKE: Billie!


BILLIE: Mike, I have the Beat working for me!  Athletics is fine, but there’s so much more I can do with my strength, like protecting defenseless kids from trouble-makers and righting whatever wrongs cross my path… 

MIKE: But this is real life, not some comic book!  It’s dangerous out there.


BILLIE: That’s why it’s fun.


Mike stops running.  Billie tries to be sympathetic.


BILLIE: Don’t ya see Mike, a person like me needs to challenge herself, constantly.  I have to know just how much I can dish out, just how much I can take.  It’s all very… exhilarating.  Can’t you understand that?


Mike relents, smiles gently at his special friend.

MIKE: Sounds like you're beginning to like being a 'lonely little in-between.'

BILLIE (with feminist pride): Well, if being a super-athlete puts me "in between" the sexes, that's exactly where I want to be.

MIKE: What about the lonely part?

This one gives Billie a little pause.  But just a little.

BILLIE: That kind of thing used to bug me, but I know better now.  I can go the girly route if I have to.  Besides, who's lonely?  I belong to three different boy's teams, not to mention the local Boy Scouts, and have more guys calling for me than most of the glamor pusses around here.

MIKE (chuckles): Yeah, but their guys are calling for a different reason!

Billie rolls her eyes.  Then, after a second, she looks at her cherished friend-turned-suitor-turned friend again, and smiles warmly.

BILLIE: Come on.  Let's race!

MIKE (groaning): But you always win!

BILLIE: I know!

A cute moment, and then... both take off, running for all they're worth.  Strong, athletic teenage bodies at the peak of physical perfection, strutting their considerable stuff.

And, of course, Beat-bolstered Billie winds up running poor Mike into the ground, as always!




***


Although they've broken up as a "romantic couple," Mike and Billie continue to be great friends, with Mike sometimes drawn into the Beat-empowered tomboy's wild adventures.  Ironically, the most important man in Billie's life now is longtime rival Eddie Davis, and that's only because he's so tireless in his ruthless attempts to destroy her as a competitor.  Frustrating Davis no end, Billie seems to get a charge out of defying and defeating this ever-scheming egoist.  The following exchange establishes their relationship:

Two contenders for Harding's most anticipated Triathlon event stand side-by-side for a quick interview.  And already the fervor of competition is on full display.


"I'm not a girl, I'm an Equal," insists sixteen year-old Billie Carol, ready for high-speed action against formidable male athletes in her track suit, short-shorts and sneaks.  As a matter of fact, many experts consider this bright-eyed young female not only equal to the guys she competes against, but notably better.  Tapping into "The Beat," an inner source of rhythmic power that dramatically amplifies her physical prowess, fresh-faced, eager for action Billie can outplay and outfight any guy at anything.  Track, football, pole-vaulting, kickboxing... you name it!


On the other hand, "That silly tomboy is always underfoot, getting in the way of real athletes, like myself," proclaims local sports star Eddie Davis, Billie's most persistent and least tolerant rival. "She needs to grow up in a hurry... maybe put on a dress once in a while to remind herself she’s a girl, y'know, instead of trying to compete with men at men's games."


Billie just rolls her eyes. "Well as a rule, I try not to say anything negative about a fellow athlete," she explains patiently.  "But the truth is, I get a real rush when I run blowhard bullies like Davis here into the ground.  It’s like, what's the matter, Fast Eddie... your legs aren't long enough?"


 “Y'know one of these days I'm gonna lose my cool and give this pushy brat the spanking she deserves!"


"Just try it, Davis!" 


"Grow up, runt!"


Unfazed and energized, Billie sticks out her tongue and wiggles her fingers in defiant response.  Then she dashes away, down the schoolyard track… an infuriated Eddie Davis hot on her sneakered heels.


With the "Beat" as her inner ally, an overjoyed Billie races far, far ahead... Finally, the blonde dynamo's gotten such a distance away from Eddie that she actually stops and turns to look back at him, confidently placing fists-on-hips and shaking her head.


Apparently this sort of thing happens all the time.  "Hey, Mr. Macho!  What’s keeping you?" Billie gleefully shouts to her far-off, pathetically pumping opponent.  Then she energetically gives him the finger and continues her supersonic run.


Ahh, the Beat!  Billie's very own built-in weapon against boy braggarts, jealous jocks, and old school thinkers who believe girls should behave more demurely.  It's that driving rock-and-roll rhythm in her head that gets this young woman racing like a rocket.  She smokes the competition not only in running contests, but with heavy-duty gymnastic feats and even physical combat skills.  "Bring it on, I'm ready for anything!" laughs the track-suited teen wonder, challenging bullies both young and old at every turn.


With the Beat on Billie’s side, there's no way she can lose!


3 comments:

bud_bierly said...

Billie is one of those characters from the '60s who had some kind of magical or scientific edge that allowed them to overcome all odds and solve their problems. I think of Popeye with his spinach, Felix with his magic bag, Batman with his utility belt, Fearless Fly with his glasses, Underdog with his super energy vitamin pill, Roger Ramjet with his proton pill, Sinbad with his belt, Hercules with his ring, Uncle Martin with his Martian powers, Jeannie with her magic, Samantha with her witchcraft, etc.

GirlPower said...

That's exactly right! Billie is very much like a cartoon superhero with a power "gimmick" -- the Beat. But she's not invulnerable, and is temporarily defeated in every tale (like Popeye) until she turns things around for a decisive comeback. Speaking of Popeye, many of these tales (inspired by actual '60s treatments) borrow set-ups and situations from the old 'toons, with the Beat replacing spinach as a handy device that re-empowers Billie after she's been laid low.

Gary Gerani said...

These story ideas were created in the mid-'60s at the height of the camp craze, so it's not surprising the concepts and character squabbles are over-the-top. I think the fan writers here have done a fine job updating them without losing their original, outrageous flavor. Billie, based on Patty Duke, remains an irresistibly cute character in any incarnation.